Could the freedom to flow be found in giving up the freedom to control?
As a mind bound to the desire to express, I find it difficult to find my words, sounds, and connection of thought when I am surrounded by the overriding need to control the medium. Fonts, structure, overall layout, integration, and the lack of the one-true theme that just accents the right parts and fits right in to my purpose ... and get it to be responsive and functional ... and get it direct and fast ...
Options, perfection driven, and dangerous unending learning ...
All of it becomes locusts swarming, surrounding, and diving down to the frozen keystrokes to devour the decisions, the messages, and the intended textually painted landscape of my mind — decimating the valley and making it barren by the parasites of formality and doubt which take root to the soil to suffocate any sprout that dare peaks up.
Dream to demise. Dream to demise. Death by a crushing burden. A perpetual trap for every fool's errand. The lure of false attentions to leave intention drowning in the vacuum of attention withdrawn.
Taking up less for the benefit of more.
The intention of using write.as is to surrender, if even for the moment, the powers that are holding me down. If I am will to relegate myself to a generic skiff that takes me down the river, across the waters of my expression, and see all that it touches and affects ... then so be it. I am not tethered to the dock still building a boat with changing blueprints and tripping on the the moorings to find that in a matter of hours or days, any slightly assembled vessel sinks within the chaos and the port abandoned.
It is a case of Do now. then Do better..
By not battling the devil among the demons of details, I can gradually power that forming world through experience and put down a strong foundation each translation of what lies within to a communicable structured form. As depth and reach expand, then a detail can be taken on with the confidence and the view added value, not necessity. By vanquishing each detail separate from the masses, I believe the horde loses the ability to overwhelm and conquer and will diminish. Finally, with the fall of the chaos of choices, that devil — the anxiety that is was my beast of burden — will have no power over me.